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Procrastination


Minka : “Ricky.. Shouldn’t we be getting ready for our trip on Saturday instead of watching TV??”
Ricky : “Minka, If you’re going to live here you need to know the rules. When Dad is home the TV is on HGTV 24/7. When he’s away, we binge watch shows on Netflix and sometimes we eat breakfast for dinner. It’s only Monday. We’ve got plenty of time to do trip things!”
Minka : “Maybe we should do some research on where we’re going and what there is to see in Italy..?”
Ricky : ” I’m good. I already know Italian. When you see someone you say ‘chow’ to them. That means ‘Hi’ even though it sounds like you’re asking for food… Can you move your head? I can’t see…”
Minka : **sigh**

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Another New One!

Ricky : “What’s this?? Another new kid??!! She’s wearing my socks and shoes, Mom!!”
Me : “This is Minka! You can share your socks and shoes with her. Her feet are actually a little bigger than yours…”
Ricky : “So, she’s stretching out my shoes then??!! Awwwww!!”
Egg the Elephant : “I think she’s got your scarf on too, Ricky…”
Me : “Omg. I have clothes for her on order! You’ll get your stuff back soon, I promise.”
Minka : “Hi Guys!! Ricky, are these your underpants I’m wearing?? I like them but they’re a little big…”
Ricky : “Gah!”

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STELLA!!


Ricky : “Today we are having a blizzard. There is not a lot of snow on our railings, but there is over a foot of snow on the ground. Some places in our yard are quite a bit higher. You can’t see very far. Dallas keeps ringing the bell to go out and do pees. The snow comes up past his boy bits! Brr!! I am tired from shoveling the driveway, so I’m going inside to get some cocoa.”
Me : “Lies! You didn’t shovel the driveway! The neighbor did!”
Ricky : “..I showed him where to plow…”
Me : “From inside the house?? You haven’t gone out at all!! Right now you’re standing just outside the back door! You haven’t stepped a foot into the snow!”
Ricky : “I’m telepathic… I told him with my mind.”
Me : “O M G.”

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World Traveler


Ricky : “Today I’m wearing the shirt that Mr. John Baens made me. He also made me a passport, so we hopped on a plane and went to Spain! Dad bought me this Spanish leather bag here in Spain. That is a famous Spanish fountain behind me and a Spanish kid!”
Me : “Ricky!! We are at a mall in Connecticut, not Spain!!”
Ricky : “MOM!! My bag is really from Spain though.. Dad brought it back for me.”
Me : “That’s true..”
Ricky : “And I’m pretty sure that girl is Spanish…”
Me : “I honestly have no idea whether she’s Spanish or not..”
Ricky : “Go ask her!”
Me : “Omg.. No. You’re ridicuous!”

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Another Wiener Wednesday

Ricky : “C’mon, you guys! Can you walk a little faster??!”
Tiny Tina : “The sidewalk is a little slippery… I sure hope I don’t lose my balance and have to grab on to Frenchie’s cute little bubble butt to break my fall… Uhhhhhh”
Frenchie : “I knew my butt felt warm! Stop breathing on it, Tiny Tina!!”
Egg : “She’s like a walking hormone…”